Zoe Noel

Today is Zoe's birthday.  Just like I did with Noah I thought I would take this time to document her birth story.

Being pregnant with Zoe was a trial.  I had morning sickness before I knew I was pregnant and the intense nausea lasted the entire pregnancy.  I couldn't even think about food without getting sick.  I tried everything to make it better.  Finally, my mom found biobands online and ordered me some.  Though it didn't eliminate my sickness I did find relief enough to eat.

I remember with clarity the day we found out Zoe was a girl.  Zach was certain we would have a boy.  He was counting on having a boy.  When we went in for the ultrasound I was looking at my husband instead of the screen when the doctor made that announcement.  The look of horror on Zach's face was so clear.  We got in the car after the appointment and sat in silence.  I was secretly ecstatic but I could tell Zach wasn't so much.  It took a while but finally he got over some of his fears.

The morning of the day Zoe made her arrival Zach got up early and left for work.  I was a week before my due date.  I was awoken by a phone call from my former boss asking if I would come back to work for him after the baby was born if he allowed me to work part-time.  Still laying in bed I called my mom to tell her that news.  I was feeling good, energetic, ready to take on the world and get cracking on that to-do list I wanted to complete before baby arrived.  I got out of bed to hop in the shower and my water broke.  Immediately I called Zach and couldn't reach him.  Then I called my mom.  "Mom, I think my water just broke."  Mom: "What do you mean you think?! Call the doctor!" 

I called my doctor and was told to get to the hospital and then tried calling Zach again.  Finally I tracked him down and told him that today we were having a baby.  While waiting for him to get here I checked my bag, gathered my toiletries and was thinking about taking a shower when Zach arrived.  Zach came home: "What are you doing? We have to get going!" Me: "I want to shower first." Zach: "Are you crazy? We are having a baby! We have to get going!!"

Yeah, we lived about 1 minute from the hospital.  I was having no contractions.  I didn't get my shower...

Once in the hospital they started me on pitocin since I was not dilated or having any other labor symptoms.  Holy Cow, when those contractions started!  Labor was hard and I had problems delivering Zoe.  My last push was going to be my last regardless if she came or not. Zoe Noel Bechtold was born that evening at around 6:30. Her little head was blistered from the vacuum and I was completely exhausted.  I had to stay in the delivery room much longer than usual because I kept losing consciousness and I didn't get to hold my daughter until the next day.  I also didn't get to have my shower until the next evening.

The first two weeks of precious Zoe's life was (I hate to admit) the hardest days of my life.  I was having a difficult recovery, I wasn't producing enough milk to satisfy Zoe, and she never stopped crying.  I went days without any sleep and I truly experienced post-partum depression before we got her feedings figured out and things levelled out. 

Those two weeks of misery now seem trivial when I look into my love's face.  She was a very good baby.  Very happy, always smiling.  I can't imagine what my life would be life without her in it.

Five years later I can see the young woman my daughter is going to grow into be.  She is so compassionate, empathizing with everyone she encounters.  She is dramatic, feeling things so intensely.  She is stubborn, refusing to budge on what she thinks.  She is so much like her mother.

I am so proud of Zoe.  I can't wait to see her continue to mature and blossom.  Happy birthday, my sweet, loving, silly girl.  I love you!

Zoe one day old.

Happy Zoe at 2 months.

Little diva.

NoPax

Today is Noah's 2nd birthday!  I can't believe my baby is so big.  It seems like yesterday that he was an infant.  I remember looking into his face and wondering what he was going to be like when he got older, wondering what his voice would sound like, wondering how his features would change.  He's such a sweet child.

It's amazing how when you are pregnant you feel like it's forever before that baby gets here.  You are uncomfortable, sick, tired, and anxious.  Then that baby gets here and after a while you have a hard time remembering the discomfort.  The same thing happens when you have an infant.  You forget what sleeping through the night feels like.  You have a hard time visualizing what it's like to have a toddler.  Those moments are so fleeting it's important to remember.

Noah was a planned c-section.  I had so many problems with Zoe's delivery that my doctor and I decided that would be best.  I didn't want the surgery.  I was terrified and even after enduring what I went through with Zoe's birth, I wavered with that decision.  We went to the doctor on the Thursday before Good Friday for an ultrasound and it was decided then that Noah would come the following Tuesday.  I remember going back to work and telling everyone that I would not be back after the Easter holiday.  My shower was that afternoon and suddenly it was becoming so real. 

With Zoe my water broke and I didn't have time to dwell too much on what was going to happen right before the delivery.  This time I knew for certain that we were going to have a baby on Tuesday, April 6.  I was so excited, trying to make sure everything was done before baby came.  We went through Easter weekend, busy as always, and I was very aware that this was our last time as a family of three.  I was so excited for Noah to be here but also mourning our final moments with Zoe as an only child.

Tuesday morning came and we had to be at the hospital at 10:30 (I think, I may be wrong here).  I had already had my lab work done the day before and was  sporting my hospital bracelet.  Zach went to take Zoe to school while I showered and repacked my bag for the millionth time.  Zach was late getting home, he's a gabber and has a problem breaking off conversations, and I was already stressed.  I am the type to rather be at a place 20 minutes early than five minutes late.  Finally we got the car loaded and off we went to the hospital. 

Several babies decided they wanted to arrive on baseball's opening day (one reason we chose that day rather than a day later in the week) so we were running behind schedule.  I wasn't there long before the braxton hicks I had been experiencing for a few months turned into full-on contractions.  The nurse would pop in periodically and ask if I was feeling those contractions.  You will be proud of me, I didn't smack her once.  Finally the time came and I was wheeled into surgery where after more waiting and 3 attempts at the spinal (OWEY) the time had finally come to see my sweet child.  Two and a half hours later than scheduled I heard those sweet cries.  No love was more instantaneous.

He was a good baby.  He slept a lot and ate a lot, not much has changed there.  He also had colic the first two months, just in the evenings.  As rough as those evenings were the fact he was so sweet the other times more than made up for it.  I never had that feeling of complete exasperation like I had with Zoe.  Life was lovely and those weeks passed so quickly.

Noah is now a very energetic, adventurous, happy two year old.  He is my cuddle-bug, my sweet heart.  He is my biggest "helper" and during those rough months in New Boston, he was my joy.  I can't wait to see what kind of man he becomes.

Road Trip!

Last weekend the kids and I loaded in the car and hit the road.  We traveled back to Plainview for my grandmother's 90th birthday party.  It's not a trip we could of made had we still been living in New Boston, but since we are closer, those six hours don't seem so bad.  I always worry when we get to see family if Noah will remember them.  In the past it has always taken him about a day to warm up to everyone again.  This trip, however, he went running to my mom with open arms.  Relief!

Usually our trips home are stressful and frantic.  We prefer to only go home when we have plenty of time to stay, just so we can have the time to fit everyone in.  I didn't feel stressed this trip.  Perhaps it was because Zach didn't go with me, I don't know.  I didn't do much.  Mom and I worked on jigsaw puzzles in the evenings, enjoying visiting together.  Thursday we celebrated my sister's birthday with a great meal (gluten free of course).

Saturday was the day of the party.  We weren't sure how many people would brave the wind (West Texas wind, I do no miss you) to come celebrate with us, but I thought we had a great turnout.  I may have consumed a slice or two of delicious cake.  I really enjoyed being able to sit and visit with family that I don't get to see very often.  Zoe remarked to me that she didn't want Grammy to die.  When I asked her why she thought she was going to die, Zoe answered, "Because she's old and Dada was old and he died."  I had a difficult time convincing her that Grammy was planning on being around a while.

Saturday night, after stuffing the kids with sugar, they went to spend the night with Zach's parents.  Then my parents and I went to eat with more family sans kids!  That doesn't happen much and it was so nice.

As I crawled into bed that night, I felt overwhelmingly blessed.  I have such a wonderful family, immediate and extended.  I just cant praise them enough.

Here are a few pictures from the weekend:

 Grammy gets some help opening presents.

 My mom, grandmother, and aunt.

Dad watches the kids play outside.

We are heading back there in a week for Thanksgiving.  The kids and I are getting to be such travelers!

Happy day to you!

Hey! It's my Birthday!

Now, ordinarily, I would rather my birthday come and go without much fanfare.  Call me a grouch, but once you pass the age of 21, birthdays don't hold the same appeal.  However, thanks to my delightful family, today was a totally awesome birthday.

I was greeted this morning with the best hugs from my two little angels.  Zach actually went and bought a great card and had Zoe and Noah write in them...rather Zoe wrote and Noah, well, he just touched the pen to paper.  Zoe, with Daddy's help was able to write "Happy Birthday, Love Zoe" and "Mom." I also got what every woman with 2 children need - CANDY! Yum!  I'm so blessed.  Zoe (Zach) bought me a book (Harry Potter 3) but Zoe, immediately coming home from buying said book on Tuesday said, "Mom! We bought your book!" So I got that present early. :)

After the gifts and getting dressed we loaded up in the car and headed to the outlet malls in El Paso to do some shopping. I bought these great shoes:

Crocs make my feet happy

 I also was able to buy 2 Christmas gifts and that makes me very happy.  Then we went to Hobby Lobby to buy myself more gifts (how great is that).  Just a few, some bought today and other's a gift from my wonderful sister:

Aren't they pretty?

I was all set to bake myself a cake!  AFTER supper that is.  We ordered Chinese and it was...well, I wont use bad words on this blog.... : (  

Onto baking my cake.  I made my own buttercream icing.  It was yummy.  The cake however, well, it was not the best.  I let it over cook a little so it wasn't as moist as it could of been.  As for the decorating, we'll just call it a learning experience.  Live and learn, right???

A little sad but still yummy!

Zach helped me with the dots.  The pink icing was from a can but the white is the buttercream.  

Thanks everyone who took time out of their day to make my day a little more special.  Love you all!!

Sprinkles of thought...

Whew, what a day today has been. Noah was fussier than usual today. He has worn me out. Zoe has the listening skills of a...well, I guess a 3 year old...I'm pretty sure I sound like the grown ups on Charlie Brown to her.

I have been working hard lately on being positive and energetic. For so many months now I have had a hard time just physically getting out of bed in the morning. I'm finally feeling something akin to being human again.

Tonight Zach is at a Methodist Men function. He is beginning his busiest time of the year now and I'm not so excited. However, just knowing that I am feeling so much better makes his being gone so much easier to handle.

I'm gearing up for Easter and Zoe's birthday. This will be a different birthday for Zoe and I'm a little concerned about how she will handle things. She has this idealized idea of what birthdays are from friends and tv and she's not going to have anything like that. She has asked for about a million things for her birthday and we have had several discussions that she can not and will not get everything she asks for. She really knows how to lay on the guilt, even at her young age.

Trying everyday to be the best Me that I can be, the best mother, wife, daughter, sister and child of God...a constant struggle.

Praising God today for my loving husband, my beautiful kids, and reliable internet :) amongst other things of course.

New Pictures

So things are still super busy but life is good. Zoe is so much fun and even though I work more and we have more stuff going on I feel like we are spending more quality time as a family. I'm adding more photos some from my birthday that was at the end of August and some of Zoe last week at the church in Zach's office.

Here we are at Chilis for a surprise dinner with the Loewens and the Shricks.

Here's my free chocolate milkshake. Yummy.

Here's Zoe playing with her phone. She was talking to puppy. It was very serious.

And here's Zoe picking out which wii game to play. She likes wii.